Happy New You!

New Years bring new opportunities. A few years ago, a participant in the elevator speech workshop, Steve Builta, took the time at the end of the year to reflect on his professional life over the prior 12 months. Then, he sent out messages to those who were influential, helpful, or simply appreciated. What a great idea!

Taking a few moments to process the year in review helps us focus on what is working for us. This in turn will help us do more of these activities in the year to come. But my friend Steve took it a critical step further. He sent out thank you notes to those he felt deserved one. I know this because I was a recipient. When I discovered I had done something that Steve thought so much of, I called and asked him out to lunch. Hey, when someone tells me I made them more money than anything else that year, my reaction was, "Oh, tell me more!"

Because in my class that year he discovered his true voice and learned how to comfortably offer his elevator speech more often, he grew his business. I was glad I could serve him. And as with most things in life, the rule of reciprocity comes in: he helped me too. I learned from Steve the importance of taking time out to learn from the year behind me.

But the real breakthrough was that Steve followed up. His note to me led us to another meeting, and ultimately, several more business interactions over the next few years that benefited both of us. Lesson: thanking those who helped us this last year is another networking boon. People want to be the hero. Why not help give credit where it is due? It may help them and you become a new you in the new year.

By the way, Steve is an excellent mortgage broker and worth having on your team when you are buying real estate. +stevemc53@hotmail.com

3 non-tech ways to expand your network

Need to expand your network? Maxed out on social media efforts? Try these three non-tech ideas:

1. Cary five cards in your pocket each day and force yourself to meet five people to give them to. This gets easy after a few days of practice.

2. Take a class. Find a community class that would have the kinds of people you want to meet, and sign up. While there, be open about wanting to network with this group. They will be complimented that you think highly of them.

3. Volunteer to speak. Contact the local chamber of commerce or the Rotary Club and volunteer. If you have a topic that people would find interesting, tell a group about it. Service groups are always looking to bring in a speaker who has something interesting to share. In your message, make clear you want to keep in touch and pass around a sign in sheet to capture emails. And of course, leave your card with as many as you can.

If you have created a strong elevator speech, that is a great way to begin talking in each of the above three. Haven't made one yet, easy to do. Go to www.elevator-speech.org

Company wide elevator campaign

What if all the employees of your company tells everyone they meet about how the company can help them? What if they felt good about telling the world what they and the company does? This gorilla marketing tactic is inexpensive and effective. In essence, you are increasing your sales force by the number of total employees you have. Think of all the contacts, leads and increased business this could bring.

How? At the next company event, bring in a specialist. When I do these, I offer a keynote followed by a workshop. The keynote is an entertaining, funny way to get buy-in. The workshop is where every employee discovers his/her own way to publicly own what the company does. At mortgage brokerages, utility companies, and small businesses alike,  this program has worked. Contact me if you'd like to hear more about my consulting.

See it; say it!

What are the communication rules associated with meeting someone in a business casual setting in the U.S.? It starts with nonverbals and then sometimes progresses to verbal interactions.
First, we attempt to open a channel of interaction by making eye contact. Edward T. Hall, famous Anthropologist, notes that in the U.S., if you sustain eye contact with someone for longer than 3 seconds, you are either going to kill them or make love to them. So typically we make shorter attempts at eye contact, say around 1-2 seconds.
If eyes are met, we offer a look of interest, typically involving raised eyebrows, a questioning expression, and often a smile or friendly overall disposition. And we close in. That is, we either step toward them or lean in a bit. A split second later, we say something to begin the conversation.
It is a dance or a parade, as I have called it in previous posts, that if done right, can lead to successful interactions with people out there who need to know you and what you offer them. And it also allows them to reach out to you with what they do. Now that you have been told explicitly what you have always known implicitly, go put your two-step into motion. The more you practice, the smoother you'll become.

Power of the Card

How can an elevator speech help me prospect for my business? Simple, at the end of the conversation, tell your name and offer your card. Remember the rule of reciprocity? They will offer their card in return, unless they don't have one. When it is not offered in return, ask for it. Most times, you'll hear the"I just ran out" excuse, but then they will tell you or you can ask for their Facebook, gmail, twitter, LinkedIn or similar online identifier.

Capture contact information and details about the conversation and person immediately after. Consider an app on your phone that allows you to dictate such things to.  Later, you are primed for the next step: follow-ups.

As soon as you can, send a follow-up email out to your new acquaintance. Oftentimes, a simple message like "It was nice to meet you today at ____" is enough. Now you are in contact with someone that you have already warmed up to and who knows what you can do for them. Congratulations, you moved someone from stranger to your network.

5 ways to start a chat.

Seems silly. You want to meet someone but don't know what to say. Fact is, it really matters little what you say, just saying anything usually works fine. But we use this lame excuse of not knowing what to say so we don't have to extend ourselves beyond our safety zone.

Here are five things to say.
1. Talk about them. Notice their smile, tie, umbrella, whatever and say you like it. Any reference to them works. Do they remind you of someone. Say so.
2. Talk about the surroundings. Is it cold in here? Say so. Or ask if they are cold. The old stand by here is to mention the weather. There's a reason this has become trite: it works!
3. Talk about yourself. Having a really good day? Own it. Tell someone else. I bet they will ask why, and bam!, you are in a conversation. Then you can ask how their day is going.
4. Ask for a favor. Do you know what time it is? Can you tell me where a good (insert ethnic choice) restaurant is?
5. Be blunt. If all else escapes you, be blunt. Start with "I'd really like to talk to you but don't know what to say... Has that ever happened to you? Funny thing, huh?" or similar.
You might practice one of these techniques each day for a week. Soon you will be over the misconception that you don't know what to say to start a conversation. More times than not, you will succeed in initiating a chat.

Care for a Danish, anyone?

A few groups of Danish students have visited my college, and for each group, I was asked to provide some business communication coaching. Great experience. What surprised me most was their reactions to the elevator speech. It was a novel idea to them. And they loved it.

We began by observing that each culture has its own secret nonverbal rules, such as shaking hands versus bowing when greeting someone. In the U.S. (I am not an expert in international business comm.), we initiate conversations in a very specific way. It's a dance, and if you misstep, you are not going to get positive feedback from your dance partner. 

What's interesting is if you falter on the nonverbal part of the dance, the response you will get is surely going to be a negative nonverbal reaction. If you are not from the U.S., and you don't understand the dance, you may be left wondering why Americans are so rude, unfriendly, etc. Truth is, we are trying to teach the dance. Through rewards and reinforcement, cultural norms are passed along across generations. Once the Danish business students understood this, and were overtly (verbally) taught the nonverbal rules to engagement here, they began to see that Americans are not unfriendly at all. Then those Danes could dance.