Care for a Danish, anyone?

A few groups of Danish students have visited my college, and for each group, I was asked to provide some business communication coaching. Great experience. What surprised me most was their reactions to the elevator speech. It was a novel idea to them. And they loved it.

We began by observing that each culture has its own secret nonverbal rules, such as shaking hands versus bowing when greeting someone. In the U.S. (I am not an expert in international business comm.), we initiate conversations in a very specific way. It's a dance, and if you misstep, you are not going to get positive feedback from your dance partner. 

What's interesting is if you falter on the nonverbal part of the dance, the response you will get is surely going to be a negative nonverbal reaction. If you are not from the U.S., and you don't understand the dance, you may be left wondering why Americans are so rude, unfriendly, etc. Truth is, we are trying to teach the dance. Through rewards and reinforcement, cultural norms are passed along across generations. Once the Danish business students understood this, and were overtly (verbally) taught the nonverbal rules to engagement here, they began to see that Americans are not unfriendly at all. Then those Danes could dance.

The shortest distance between two people

Victor Borge said laughter is the shortest distance between two people. I think a light-hearted smile is the kindest thing to offer a stranger. A smile signals all is well and you are not a threat. It invites a reciprocal smile. Smiles open the door for greetings, meetings, and laughs. Laughs open doors beyond your grasp, if you make the most of them.

Today's tip: Smile at strangers! If all that happens is the person looks down and keeps walking, you have still made a positive impact. It is a no-lose proposition. Their spirits are lifted and yours are too. Think of it as paying it forward. You are setting others up to have a more positive interaction with the next, unsuspecting person. So, c'mon. Show the world your pearly whites (battleship grays or corn yellows).

Business Listening 101

The whole point is to connect. If you connect you move toward helping someone else. This happens because there is a sense of familiarity and trust. You cannot get that from a monologue! Listen up, you sleezy sales sharks (think the insurance salesman in Groundhog Day), because your blathering on and on to perfect strangers is a big problem. It hurts you, them, and the reputation of an elevator speech. So stop that!

Now for the rest of you, we are interested in using an elevator speech to lead to meaningful connections with others. Last time I suggested you think in terms of what you do, such as a need you solve, benefit you bring, etc. After you offer that to someone, you are looking to create a dialogue. One way to do this is to couch your elevator speech as a question. For example, "Did you ever wonder what areas of town are improving in value the fastest?" asks the real estate agent. "Have you seen all the fine print in online loans these days?" asks the mortgage broker. Both examples lead to a conversation. That is the real goal here.

You are prospecting them and they are prospecting you too. The faster you can get to the give-and-take of a conversation, the sooner you and they will hone in on where you two match up, if at all. Let's put to bed the old notion that as long as you are talking, you are selling. Take a breath and listen. Good luck!